Sexuality jokes
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Old Ladies and The Flasher
There were three old ladies sitting on a
park bench talking amongst themselves when a flasher came by. The flasher stood right in
front of them and opened his trench coat.
Well, the first old lady h…
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Be Careful With That Viagra
Q: Did you hear about the man who swallowed his Viagra too slowly?
A: He got a stiff neck.
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The Seven Dwarfs
The Seven Dwarfs were sitting in a tub feeling happy.
So Happy got up and left.
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Ear Condoms
Q. Why did the man put condoms on his ears during sex?
A. He didn't want to have hearing aids.
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Dutch Virgin
Q: What do you call a virgin in Dutch?
A: Goodandtight!
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Line of Blondes
What do you call a line of blondes?
Easy Street
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The Skeleton
What do you call a horny skeleton?
A boner!
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Man Quiz -- Are You Trained?
As you grow older, what lost quality of
your youthful life do you miss the most?
A. Innocence.
B. Idealism.
C. Going into the ladies room with your mom.
In your opinion, the ideal
pet i…
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Monica's Testimony
How did we know that Monica would testify?
Because she has a history of not being able to keep her mouth closed.
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Chicken and egg are lying in...
A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg is frowning and looking very frustrated.
The egg mutters, to no one in particular
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Gay Church
How do you know you're in a gay church?
Only half of the congregation is kneeling!
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Frosty
Q. Why was Frosty smiling?
A. He saw the snowblower coming.
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Three Hellos
A man comes home from work early to find his wife in bed with three men.
He is completely shocked and shouts, ''Hello, Hello, Hello!''
His wife whines, "What? No hello for me!?!"
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Moby Dick
What is Moby Dick's father's name?
Papa Boner.
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Working Relationship
A guy wakes up one morning with a hangover. ''Honey, I know I made a fool out of myself at the party last night, so tell me what I did.''
''You got in an argument with your boss.''
''Well, pi…
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In Praise of Older Women
(which in our society means over 25)
An older woman can wear any hat she chooses and nobody will laugh. A younger woman wearing the same hat will always look like a lampshade in a brothel. A…
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Joke by a Latent Homosexual
What is the difference between Mad Cow Disease and PMS?
Two tits!
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Women and Pool Tables
What is the difference between a woman a pool table?
On the pool table, you put the balls in the hole and the stick stays out.
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Greek Navy
What's the highest position in the Greek Navy?
Rear Admiral!
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Confucius...Sausage
Man who stuffs his own sausage, pounds his own meat.
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Confucius...Fisherman
An expert fisherman is a ''master-baiter.'''
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Dinner's On The Table
Q. What do lesbians cook for dinner?
A. They don't. They eat out!
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Eyes Wide Shut
Why do women have sex with their eyes closed?
Because they can't stand seeing a man having a good time!
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Ceramic Guys
What do guys and ceramic tiles have in common?
Lay them right the first time and you can walk on them for the rest of your life!
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Things Just Fallin' Off
This morning as I was buttoning my shirt, a button fell off. After that, I picked up my briefcase, and the handle fell off. Then I went to open the door, and the doorknob fell off. I went to get …
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The New 69
Due to the changes in the law, 69 is now 75.
There's a new tax on eating out...
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Shekshy Legsh
You have very nice legs. What time do they open?
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Chuck The Yuck
What did the man say to the toothpaste model after she gave him oral sex?
"WOW! Those are the whitest teeth I've ever come across."
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P. Diddy on a Diet
What dessert doesn't Puff Daddy/P. Diddy eat any more?
Jello (j-Lo)
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Yo Mama's So Fat... Smokes
Yo mama's so fat, after sex she smokes ham.
